FRF '99 News
FLASH! URGENT NEWS! [1999.8.1 00:04]
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?
We have received reports that he is in the vicinity of the Fuji Rock Festival and masquerading as a Net reporter.
If this man accosts you, be on the alert. He is an escapee from every major institution on the planet, highly skilled at subterfuge, affecting a quite convincing Birmingham accent and even more authentic Japanese.
He is known to fondle himself in odd places at odd times.
He was last sighted smoking a cigarette with a monkey in the forest and a look of extreme contentment on his face.
Do not engage him in conversation, because you may think you understand him but you won't.
If you sight him please report him to the Fuji Go Round Net team immediately. We would like to put him under medical supervision.
It's for his own good. Really.
1999.8.1 Reported by Carmen San Diego
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